Thousands of people have already ready Nicola’s post about Janice Langbehn, who was denied access to her dying partner by Miami hospital personnel who refused — refused — to acknowledge the legality of her durable power of attorney for healthcare and living will. A woman died alone while her partner and children pleaded to see her.
Nicola’s post — which you should read, please, if you have not — is titled “trembling with rage.” Me too.
In 2001, a friend who was supposed to be enjoying a nice dinner at our house ended up driving us to the emergency room instead, where I was hustled into the back with what turned out to be acute appendicitis. Our friend (*hugs Liz through the internet*) went back to our house, found our power of attorney and brought it back for Nicola.
No one gave us any trouble. No one looked at the legal documents that cost us thousands of dollars (that if you are married you pay nothing for because you don’t need them) and said, I don’t care if you have a lawyer, you’re not a real human being as far as I’m concerned and I’m not going to treat you like one, so you just sit out here and suffer and maybe we’ll get around to paying attention to the thing in the back at some point.
None of that. They just nodded and let her come in and hold my hand until the surgery, and then they brought her into the recovery room when I woke up. Just like you would for anyone.
But that’s Seattle. What if we’d been in Miami? Or Houston? Or Baton Rouge? And what happens if Washington voters decide in the next few weeks that what happened in Miami is okay here too? What happens if they decide that we aren’t real human beings as far as they are concerned?
You want to know what happens? Ask Janice Langbehn. You can’t ask Lisa Pond because she died alone in a strange hospital without a chance to say goodbye.
When people don’t have equal protection under the law, they suffer. They lose their families, their jobs, insurance, their pension, their homes, their access, the right to control the important moments and decisions of their own lives. If you think that’s okay, then you are saying that it’s okay to be hateful, and that your rules about what’s Good in the world are more important than real human suffering. Just so you know, that makes you an asshole in my book. But this is a democracy whether I like it sometimes or not, and every asshole gets a vote. You must vote.
Although I sincerely hope you will vote to Approve Referendum 71. Because you have the chance to save lives, save families, mitigate heartbreak, and just maybe make sure that someday I don’t die alone, wondering why my beloved Nicola isn’t there.